…try to shake my hand again and I swear to god I will RIP OFF YOUR ARM!
Seriously. There is a certain person who, every time I see him (EVERY TIME!) gives me this dead-fish, walk-by handshake and I HATE IT! I’m not a huge fan of shaking hands on a normal basis, but at least have the confidence to give me a proper, solid, politician-style handshake!
Plus, okay, a handshake may be expected upon first meeting someone, but YOU HAVE MET ME THREE TIMES BEFORE! YOU NO LONGER NEED TO SHAKE MY HAND! I’m not a guy, I’m not your colleague, I don’t even like you (because of your weenie name – and I am not one to ordinarily dislike or mock someone just because of their name, but this one I cannot even speak aloud without dropping into a sing-song, nasal voice – and your PATHETIC handshake), so just wave at me as you walk past if you feel the need to involve a gesture of some kind (or, for the love of god, ACTUALLY STOP WALKING WHILE YOU SHAKE MY HAND).
Oh, I feel so much better now. Okay. To make up for that, I’ll be posting soon about some cake, LOTS of cupcakes, and brie (I didn’t think there was a way to make cheese better than it is just on its own, but apparently, there is).